Friday, 7 February 2025

Laughs, Love, and Lessons from a Faith-Filled Decade - 10 years of wifery

Time flies when you are adulting, and let me tell you, these past ten years of marriage have been a rollercoaster of joy, faith, growth, wonder, and laughter. As I look back on this adventure, I'm filled with gratitude for the incredible journey the husband and I have riden.



We met at Lower Kabete Campus, UON in 2008, and I think we clicked instantly. First, because we enjoyed talking about our faith, and second, because I was just irresistibly cute and chatty 😊. Fast forward to 2012, we finally started dating, and by September 2014, we decided to jump the broom on a rainy day. Yes, we literally jumped over puddles to get to the altar! It was like a romantic comedy with a splash of rain – quite literally
Then came NDOA, and my greatest desire was to be ONE, in the literal sense of it. I imagined us praying together always, reading the Bible together always, driving to work together, driving back home together after work, visiting our families together... basically, everything together. But then reality hit me like a ton of bricks. Turns out, he's an evening person, and I'm a morning person. Our togetherness, especially in praying and Bible reading, was not together-ring 😒. Hanging out together all the time started to feel like being stuck in a never-ending episode of a reality show. I suddenly found myself wanting time away from this husband of my youth! Picture this: me, sneaking out of the house like a ninja, just to get a moment of peace. Who knew that "together forever" could sometimes feel like "together too much"?

Kidogo kidogo…..we navigated this togetherness madness and learnt that it is perfectly okay to give each other space, but to be very intentional in reconnecting many times to pursue ONENESS. Being the chatty one, I always share my thoughts, ideas, fears, frustrations, office gossip, with the husband, and this forces him to listen and share his nothing box with me. Also, praying together in our house is a must, but unlike most families, we make it short and precise because one of us is nocturnal. We also serve together in church and just hang out. It's like a sitcom where the characters finally figure out how to live together without driving each other crazy!!

Then there was an issue with how romance was expressed by the husband. Sijui prepare her before you meet in the evening, rose flowers, candle-lit dinners – all rumors and motivational speeches. First, the husband was and is a busy finance guy, and I was/am a busy auditor. Second, I had married a young man from a village in Mbooni, and he had married a ghetto girl from Mwiki. Mapenzi za preparation for evening mchana could not work for us, and we quickly navigated this romance thing like the Pokot bandits. We had to get creative with our romance – like turning our power outages into candle-lit dinners (thanks, Kenya Power!) and using our car rides to work as our version of date nights.

We disagreed about everything in our early years, including how the house was to be arranged. We are 2 choleric firstborns, a bit stiff necked & headstrong and we were building a little Gaza of a home, but thank God for His Word, it deals with the hard hearts and aligns us.
In our third year, through to our seventh, we experienced a monster of a season. For seven long years, we yearned for children, our hearts aching with every passing day. By the seventh year, we had joyfully coupled with four families, each blessed with beautiful children. For seven years, we faithfully served in the family ministry at church, surrounded by families, children, and pregnant friends and strangers. Yet, we were struggling with a seemingly endless wait. We were a whirlwind of emotions—anxious, hopeful, angry at and with God, fearful, and our faith wavering. We questioned God, believed in His Word one moment, and doubted it the next. It was a difficult and overwhelming time, but through it all, God graciously blessed us with the gift of parenthood in 2021 and again in 2023. Today, ‘gently parenting’ Mumo and Wema





My journey in 10 years of marriage has been nothing short of an adventure. Imagine a ride on Kenyan roads: some parts are flood-filled potholes that make you question your life choices, some bits are dusty and bumpy enough to give you an impromptu massage, and then there are those rare stretches like the expressway where you feel like you're gliding on air. Through it all, God has been my gracious chauffeur, navigating me through the chaos and the calm. Enter Mumo & Wema, my little bundles of joy who have taught me that parenting is often romanticized. These two have shown me that parenting toddlers requires an abundance of grace and a gentle heart. I'm praying for a gentle heart because, let's face it, parenting toddlers is like trying to herd cats – adorable, but utterly chaotic
 

30 comments:

  1. What a journey, to behold. Glory to God... Someone should have prepared us for somethings hehehe.

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  2. Keep at it, may God keep growing your marriage gor His glory

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  3. Wow,..... just wow. Enjoy the journey and motherhood to the fullest dear. Well deserved

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  4. Amazing! Having own time doesn't mean abandonment. It's healthy in marriage. Awesome!

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  5. You are an amazing storyteller. I was right there with you. Continue inspiring and allowing God use you for His kingdom

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  6. Shiko, this is a very good piece! Congratulations on hitting 10 years in marriage! Its clear it was by God's grace! May the years ahead be full of joy even as you learn, unlearn and relearn! May you guys move from glory to glory! I thoroughly enjoyed reading through and I liked the good sense of humour! Baraka to the next 10 years and more!

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  7. Raw and unfiltered. The reality…so lovely but so many hoops to jump through.

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  8. Wuuuueeeh, marriage is like dealing with a global challenge. You get to the come to Jesus moment where expectations versus reality are like east to west. Accept the realities and manage expectations.
    It gets beautiful when you customize from global perceptions to local (read 2people) solutions and actions.
    Off to the next 10!

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  9. Wow..this is so beautifully written

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  10. Nice reading Shiko!!, I'm Glad to be part of your journey, can't wait for what is next our God is full of surprises.

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  11. The next 10 God will surprise you beautiful ❤️

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  12. Thank you Shiko for sharing your story,very encouraging..it is indeed a journey, God's grace is sufficient

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  13. Washington Kahoro7 February 2025 at 07:25

    So good a piece Shiko cuzo. Life is real you know. It's to be lived

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  14. I celebrate you and your husband. I loved this read. I will follow up for a catch up call.

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  15. Beautifully penned. More grace and beautiful moments to you two.

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  16. Thanks Shiko for sharing. I also expected the togetherness 24/7 until I realized it's not possible. I like how you write with humour and take us along. More grace to the next 10 years and beyond.

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  17. So beautiful 😍 🤩

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  18. I celebrate you Shiko!

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  19. Sooo beautifully written! Mbele iko sawa indeed,God bless your marriage!

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  20. Great piece Shiko.....a fellow Anchor here cheering you on.

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  21. Hilarious and deep.

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  22. Amazing read. Well done!

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  23. Real, punchy and full of humour. May the next 10 and beyond be blessed.

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  24. This is a beautiful piece 🤍

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  25. Wow!..Beautiful and hopefully journey,...It has been God all through,... May blessings continue reigning upon you siz,.....🙏🙏

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  26. Dearest Wanjiks! I love that you're penning your heart once again.

    May God bless your entire family 🥰🥰🥰

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  27. Awesome Anchor

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  28. Thanks for such a beautiful piece. Quite an encouragement to those navigating through different life & marriages phases.
    Wishing you and your family more blessed decades!

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  29. I celebrate you

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