Sister in the pew across mine

Dear sister in the pew across mine:

I see the way you grip your hands when you see your younger siblings take over the corporate scene. I see the way you try not to cry as you watch your younger sister get married. I see the way you lean your head back blinking back tears as your best friend brings forth new life into this world. I see the way you stare straight ahead, willing not to think about it.

I see you. 

When my husband and I walk into that church meeting, your eyes catch mine and then quickly look away. Turning from the sight of someone who has what you want. Anything to keep from dwelling on what you want, but you do not have.

I see you at the grocery store, too. At the park. At the restaurant. At the work party, the neighborhood potluck, the family reunion.

But somehow it feels even more painful when I see you at church. Maybe it’s because I know you’ll have to sit in that wedding ceremony for a whole hour, not just one quick turn down the store’s aisle or a sidewalk’s length at the park.

Let me encourage you, I also have that one thorn in the flesh that I wish the Lord would take away.

I am sitting right where you are (maybe at a different angle) - musing over an invisible pain, a pain I cannot talk about.

Praying with Aryuv balled in my fists, praying with tears at the corners of my eyes, praying for the strength not to envy, praying for this to be the year, praying to a God I cling to and yell at, all at once.

I can guess know the way you’re thinking; because I too do question God’s agility, will He ever heal this invisible pain? A God I wish I could see and touch. 

I wish I could tell you it gets better. I wish I could make these miracles happen for us. I wish I could prophesy an end to your pain, I wish I could take away all these thorns.

I get bogged down by the load I find myself carrying, and am just unable to pray for myself, but when the praying giant arises, I pray for you – and I assure you: I see you in your invisible pain. 

So while you’re sitting there at church on Sunday, feeling alone in your pew and alone in your heart, remember that someone out here sees you and prays for you.

But things can start to shift once we start seeing each other. 

In my invisible pain, the Lord reminded me this passage of scripture:

Jeremiah 29: ⁴ This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: ⁵ “Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. ⁶ Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. ⁷ Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper.” ⁸ Yes, this is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says. ¹⁰ This is what the Lord says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place. ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. ¹⁴ I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.^[b] I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”

Ø We are to increase in this season of exile, we are to seek the Peace of God and the fruition  of God’s purposes,

Ø God still has great plans for us, and in His timing, maybe today, or tomorrow, or in twenty years’ time, He shall fulfill His good promises to us.

Lots of Love and Grace.

YOKES AND BULLOCKS

I found myself reading Proverbs 31 again, hating on this woman, she's too perfect to be human, This woman, Maybe she was Solo’s fantasy after fizzled escapades with a thousand mamasitas. Truth be told thou’ I admire this woman, and she’s part of my life goals. Who were her friends anyway? Who was her greatest influence? Did she look up to someone? Maybe, just maybe she was born noble.

God has been pointing out the power of godly friendships and the need to simply walk out of some relationships. The purpose of any godly relationship/ friendship is to produce power. When two people are in agreement about what they believe for, nothing will be impossible for them, Jesus in Matt. 18:19 tells us that if two of us agree on earth concerning anything our Heavenly Father will do it for us, But Amos 3:3 queries on the possibility of two people walking together if they do not agree, what is this they are to agree on? If we are of the household of Faith, then we must agree on Christ as Lord over our all, the core goal of all our friendships should be to honor God.

Paul in 2nd Corinthians 6:14 warns us against being yoked together with unbelievers, but does this mean that we should not associate with them who are not born again yet Jesus himself tells us that we are in the world? A yoke is a wooden bar that joins two oxen to each other and to the burden they pull. An “unequally yoked” team has one stronger ox and one weaker, or one taller and one shorter. The weaker or shorter ox walks more slowly than the taller, stronger one, causing the load to go around in circles. When oxen are unequally yoked, they cannot perform the task set before them. Instead of working together, they are at odds with one another. The truth is that the unbelieving world is governed by the principles of Satan and that Christians should be separate from that wicked world, just as Christ was separate from all the methods, purposes, and plans of the world. He had no participation in them; He formed no union with them. 

Attempting to live a Christian life with a non-Christian for our close/ friend (BFF) and ally will only cause us go around in circles, hence the need for intentional boundaries in the case of inevitable relationships like work, or business situations. We are in the world Yes, but we are not of the world, He who lives in us clearly says that if we love Him, then we must obey Him, and that is the tough truth about friendships.

Authentic friendships develop over time as both friends progress in wisdom and spiritual maturity, they are an investment, Strong Christian friendships blossoms when two friends grow together in faith, goodness, knowledge, and other godly graces. They must be built on nothing less but Jesus Christ and Righteousness. I strongly believe the Proverbs 31 woman kept authentic Godly friendships, she feared the Lord, no wonder she’ll be eternally praised.

Joshua 1: ⁸ Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.

Loads of Love,

To more intentional friendships!!!!

God's Unfailing Love

Today I share on a few things I have been learning.

Ø  We all have a story to tell and a wound to heal, a deeper glance into these reveal a beautiful reality.

My short life has been marked by some unprecedented heartbreaks, having to say good-bye to some friendships, made terrible mistakes, sunk into shame, guilt and emotional pain. In these moments, I have known and felt God’s warm embrace, experienced His deep love and mercy and I have found healing. I don't know what your story looks like but, you are uniquely poised for this very moment, to share an intimate part of God's character, this the place of untold stories, the place of healing rain, it’s a sacred ground.

Ø  It is okay not to be okay. In my ‘not okay’ moments I have known  God as my safe place, my home, my shelter, my strong tower, my song, the oxygen in my weary lungs, my protector, my strength and shield, my hope,  my God

I have learnt that when I fall, I must always get up again! Always confess up again! Always pray up again! Always live up again! Always look up again!  James 4:8, "and He will draw nigh to you." God has always responded to my repentance, He has always taken the next step toward me after I "draw nigh."

Ø  He is the Lord of the restoration, He has turned my stories and wounds into beautiful realities, in my ‘not okay’ moments, He has breathed in me His Grace, and caused me to exhale His love and Mercy.

When the wild locust has scavenged, and I have walked through dark valleys, He has restored me. Instead of ashes, He has bestowed crowns of beauty, instead of despair He has clothed me with a garment of praise, instead of shame, He has given me a double portion, instead of disgrace, I have rejoice in my inheritance. His love for us, we cannot comprehend.

I pen this to encourage everyone, wife or mother who thinks they have been to hell and back, there is hope in Christ Jesus. 

Loads of love

Shikoh!!

NO LONGER SLAVES

‘My’ Perfect husband should literally live for me, shouldn’t blink as I whine about an annoying colleague, should perceive my crappy days, help around the house, by making dinner especially now that am in school, he must ensure am forever in the seventh heaven. For the better part of 2016, I criticized, I complained, my husband of choice as he did not match up to my Mr. Perfect. I tried cloning him, he proved impossible, I presented him to the heavens, the heavens were quiet, I got really cheesed off.

It is for Freedom that Jesus set us free, we are no longer slaves to bondage; we are free from ideals, free from ourselves, free from perfection, In the Lord we find our being, our confidence and validation. God delivered the Israelites from Babylon, and puts it in King Cyrus’ heart the will to rebuild the temple in Jerusalem, that the Sons of Jacob may worship their God in Freedom, that they may find Him who called and made them a People.

We must find us in Him first, we must lay us at the cross, take up His Yoke, quit trying to reach perfection, and understand that all He wants is our broken Hearts.

If we drink from Him, from our hearts shall flow rivers of everlasting waters, rivers of life, then we shall serve our husbands, children, family and society as Christ intended, we will quit defining Submission and Love in the light of modernity and intellect and the Lord Himself shall instruct and teach us on this things. We will also quit changing ourselves, changing our husbands and children because the Holy Spirit, who gives life shall give life to these our mortal bodies and we shall confidently say that we are serving the Lord with our households.

On His shoulders, we are free to love, free to be us, to be Wives, to be Mothers. In 2017, I shall love Bae freely, by Grace as the Lord leads me.

Into 2017

As I step into 2017, I look back to 2016 disappointed in myself yet grateful that there is a God, so I will not beat myself so hard. Just like most of us, I had my 2016 goals penned down; Habakkuk 2:2 Writing the vision, and making it plain upon tables, that I did. Top on my list was to becoming a better, leaner Proverbs 31 wife, but I downed 2016 as the Proverbs 31 man, sitting on the city gates receiving praises courtesy of hubby.

So today though not as wise, patient, loving and godly as I would have wished to end 2016, head above the waters, I look back to 2016 and I have my lessons with me,

Ø  God’s name is Faithful, He remains faithful even when we are not, He cannot deny Himself, just like, am still Shikoh, whether I meet my goals or not.

Ø  God is intimately interested in the success of our marriages, His name is at stake here, He will not watch us bring down our homes, the choice to walk out on God is ours, in Him all things are held together.

Ø  There is nothing like stagnation in marriage, and so it is in life, you either grow or regress, grow in Love, or grow in hate, grow in wisdom or add to folly. Growth in Marriage is therefore very intentional. Proverbs 31 woman was an intentional wife.

Ø  Stages and Seasons in marriage are Real, after ‘the in love stage’ the ‘Reality stage’ sets in and love becomes a decision, Gary D. Chapman argues that the ‘In love stage’ is an illusion, we involuntarily love, true love is experienced in and after the ‘Reality Stage’. The real Hubby, not a perfect man, but a perfect match to my many imperfections, and I chose to love even more.

Ø  Guarding my hearts is my individual responsibilities, I must carefully and diligently consider what, who, and where to set my heart on, May the Meditations of my heart and the thoughts of my mind be pleasing to the Lord in 2017.

To a more intentional 2017

Shikoh Masika